Friday, August 5, 2011

The Dangers of Discount #Taxidermy

The Dangers of Discount Taxidermy: "

We here at Woot are no strangers to the joys of cleaning and displaying various animal pieces in your home, so we can appreciate the enthusiasm some people have for taxidermy. After all, it's an art, and it's a way to commemorate and memorialize your triumphant kill, a favorite pet, or maybe just that thing you thought was a Chupacabra in your yard. Of course in every profession there is an upper echelon, but Terrible Taxidermy focuses on one of those lower echelons. Way lower...





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'We'll put it behind some shrubs. No one will notice.'



Hey, we get it. Taxidermy's hard. It's an art form, and it takes a lot of practice. For all we know every taxidermist has a shed full of these "learning experiences." But we have to wonder how many of these were the equivalent of a living room tattoo: "Hey, I got a buddy that can probably do that for you, and CHEAP."



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"Jake, we're out of bear teeth-" "JUST SLAP SOMETHING IN THERE! What's the difference?!"




Did people pay for these? Did they receive the finished work and do anything other than scream and hurl it out the nearest window? Or was it more like when you open your Christmas presents to discover some @$%hole bought you socks again, when you have to fake a smile and say something about how nice it is and how much you appreciate the thought? We may never know.



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'There I was, rifle in hand, when the leopard came over the crest of the hill. I'll never forget the look on his face.'




Take a trip down the worst attempts to capture the majesty of nature, but before you feel bad for the horribly defaced animals contained therein, just know that it could be worse: we could be looking at Pathetic Plastic Surgery.



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The Bobcat is by far the most flamboyant and sassy of cats.




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